” “She believed that the Buddhists were right- that if you want, you will suffer; If you love, you will grieve.”

Anne Lamott

Today I fully intended to write about my first few days of recovery and continue this blog in a linear fashion, but I am not having the best day and so instead I think this will be a little bit more abstract. Today marks a little over eight weeks since I have been home. I have not seen my pets, my house, or the majority of my friends in a very long time.

I do not regret making this decision. I one hundred percent think that this was the best medical decision for my son, I feel incredibly lucky that we were both candidates for this treatment, as its harder to get than one would think. I am grateful to be in a safe place to stay, and I am grateful that my husband gets to be here with me, and continue to work so that we aren’t going into complete financial ruin. But the mental and physical toll of not only recovery, but being away from anything and everything familiar is hard. Its really hard. I miss walking my dogs, I miss seeing my mom. I spent several hours two days ago just crying.

Crying because I feel displaced.

Just a short vent. Some days are easier than others

2 thoughts on “A Wrinkle in Time

  1. Some days are easier than others and some days you just need the vent as it’s healthier than shoving it down. If you bottle it up you’ll explode and that’s not healthy for you or the lil man. Miss you! Sad I won’t see you when you get back but SO happy you’re getting the best care and to be able to follow you here!! Chin up momma you got this!

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  2. It is normal to be homesick. I’m glad you are letting the frustration out. It’s perfectly normal to feel this way and to express those feelings. It sounds corny but when I get homesick I like to plan little things I want to do with certain people or pets when I’m home. Fantasizing about those future moments makes me happy.
    Xoxoxox

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